


You and I

by lirryplease (orphan_account)



Category: One Direction
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Fights, Fluff, Kissing, Love, M/M, Memories, Minor Character Death, Oral Sex, Rimming, Sexual Content, Songfic, its just based off of the song, not really a songfic because I don't quote the song anywhere, yay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-13
Updated: 2014-01-13
Packaged: 2018-01-06 09:56:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1105427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/lirryplease
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry sat on the stairs in the house he used to call home, the house that used to be filled with light and laughter but now only housed dust and fading memories. The walls were bare, no longer holding photos which had once been so lovingly taken. All that was left now were holes in the walls that resembled the holes in Harry's heart.</p><p>Based entirely off of 'You and I'</p>
            </blockquote>





	You and I

**Author's Note:**

> I've been waiting for someone to write something based off this song and since no one had i decided to take matters into my own hands. 
> 
> I recommend listening to 'You and I' as you read this. The italics are flashbacks.
> 
> Sorry for the mistakes and bad smut

Harry sat on the stairs in the house he used to call home, the house that used to be filled with light and laughter but now only housed dust and fading memories. The walls were bare, no longer holding photos which had once been so lovingly taken. All that was left now were holes in the walls that resembled the holes in Harry's heart. 

Standing, Harry wandered through the empty rooms, the kitchen where so many meals had been cooked, moments had been shared. So many amazing meals, and many, not-so amazing ones. 

_It was their one year anniversary you see, and Harry wanted to cook something special, something other than stir fry or chicken with broccoli, he wanted to make something that Liam would remember. After hours of searching for the right recipe Harry found one and set off to slave away in the kitchen. Everything had been going perfectly fine until something went wrong and suddenly the entire kitchen was up in flames._

_"Harry what in the bloody hell are you cooking?" Liam asked as he ran into the kitchen, having smelt smoke from upstairs in the bedroom._

_Smoke was piling out of the oven and something on the stove was glowing, a burning red and yellow._

_"I don't know! I turned around for a moment and the stove caught fire and as I tried to fix it the stove just, poof!" Harry was frantically pacing around the kitchen in search for something to put out the flames with._

_As more smoke filled the room Liam quickly turned and ran to the closet in the hallway that housed a fire extinguisher, grabbing it he ran back into the kitchen. The fire alarm was beginning to beep and just as Liam made it back into the kitchen the sprinklers sputtered to life and began to rain down throughout the house. Harry squealed as the freezing water rained down on him and Liam dropped the extinguisher in defeat._

_"I'm sorry Li." Harry muttered as he moved the pot off the stove chuckling slightly._

_The more it continued to rain down on them the more Harry's giggles grew until he was holding onto the countertop to keep himself steady. Liam couldn't help the smile that grew on his face as he watched Harry who had begun to look like a drowned rat with his messy wet hair. Tears poured down Harry's face mixing with the water from the sprinklers as he laughed. Managing to gather his breath for a moment Harry walked over to where Liam was struggling to regain his breath from laughing._

_"I'm guessing we should order in." Harry suggested, his cheeks dimpling as he watched Liam sink to the ground in a fit of laughter._

_"That." Liam gasped as he tried to calm himself down. "That was hilarious, and also the last time you ever cook." Causing both he and Harry to break down into laughter again, both of them sat on the floor as they cackled in puddles of water._

_"Liam, you and I both know we'll starve if I don't cook, because you are absolute shit at cooking. Anyways I'm going to go get that new umbrella that we have in the closet." Harry stood, water still pouring down on them and went to retrieve the umbrella, opening it and holding it over his head as he walked back to where Liam was still sitting on the tiled floor of the kitchen, still laughing._

_"Well I knew that installing those sprinklers would come in handy one day, I just didn't expect it to be on our anniversary." Harry said, running his hand through his sopping hair that had since fallen into his face. Liam cuddled into him and they sat in the middle of the floor, water bouncing off the umbrella and rolling down onto the floor._

_Eventually the sprinklers stopped and fire trucks were blaring down the street, the fire alarm having triggered a warning signal down at the firehall. Harry couldn't stop giggling as the firemen burst into their home to find the two of them sitting on the floor surrounded by water, an umbrella sheltering them, and a burnt stove. Of course both Harry and Liam stopped laughing when they found out how much the water had damaged their house and how much it would cost to repair it all._  

Smiling to himself sadly Harry opened a cupboard to see a small mug still left on the shelf, it had once belonged to Liam and with a picture of him and Harry on it, Harry was convinced that it hadn't been forgotten and was instead simply unwanted. The thought stung a bit. But he understood why it had been left behind, neither of them had use for it anymore, it no longer held any meaning, at least not like it once did. Now frowning, Harry picked up the mug, and brought it to the front door where a lone box sat, and placed the mug on top of it. 

Turning, Harry went back to the kitchen where, if he looked very closely he could still see small water stains on the corner of a cabinet. That was all that was left of his disastrous experience with Liam, which would go unnoticed and unexplained to the new homeowners to come. It didn't feel right to Harry that something that had held so much meaning to him would be unappreciated by someone new. It seemed as though the thought of him and Liam living in this house was slowly fading, never to be thought of again. Countless times Harry had tried to convince himself that it was simply the house that he was letting go of, not the memories, but he knew that was a lie. Letting go of the house, the only reminder of the life that had been promised with Liam was being ripped away from him. He knew that Liam was trying to forget the memories, and maybe if Liam was letting them go, than Harry should too. 

With a defeated exhale Harry moved to the door that led to the basement and walked down the steps. He held onto the railing as he walked down them because there were countless times that he had believed he could just simply walk down these steps and would end up flat on his face with a rug burn on his chin. As he stepped off the stairs he looked around, the rooms were empty now, and all that was left were bare walls and dirty carpet. The main room which he stood in had once held sofas and a TV was eerily empty now. Only the indents in the carpet indicated that this place had once been full of excitement. Pulling his jacket tighter around him Harry ambled to the closed door which had once held a guest bed where Harry had spent more nights on than he wished to remember. 

_"What is it now? The fifth time that I've been woken up in the middle of the night to an empty bed and a phone blaring in my ear with you on the other end telling me that you’re in fucking jail!" Liam shouted as he slammed the door shut behind him. Both of their tempers were running high._

_Harry was standing in the middle of the living room, fists clenched at his sides with the remnants of another man's blood on them and cuts to prove what had happened. "This is only the second time that it's happened Liam, I don't understand why you're making such a big deal out of this. The twat had it coming."_

_Liam hung up his coat in the closet as he spoke. "That doesn't give you the right to start beating him! It's like you've suddenly turned into an animal, like I don't know you anymore! And you know for once it would be nice to be invited to one of your little outings, I mean it's not like I'm your boyfriend or anything!"_

_"For fucks sake Liam if you wanted to come along you could've!" Harry raised his hands up in exasperation._

_"I don't want to have to ask to come along Harry! I'm not as needy as you think I am. I'm just saying that it would be nice if you thought of me for once and a while! All you ever do is go out, what about spending time with me? Does it never occur to you that you're not the only one in this relationship? Or is that head of yours much thicker than I thought it was?" Liam walked passed Harry and was beginning to make his way to the kitchen when Harry grabbed his wrist._

_"You know if I'd known you were always so bitchy I never would've asked you out in the first place! If I wanted to date a bitch I could've, I've got plenty of them hanging off of me!" Harry spat in his face._

_"Let me go." Liam demanded but Harry only gripped his wrist harder._

_"I'll do whatever the fuck I want!"_

_At his words Liam went to punch him but Harry managed to grab his other hand in time and pushed Liam back against the wall forcefully causing a picture to fall off the wall and shatter._

_"Don't you fucking dare." Harry whispered dangerously into Liam's ear._

_"You know Harry, you can't always use your strength to get your way, eventually people will see through it. You're not the same person anymore, the Harry I know wouldn't be getting sent to jail for fighting in a pub."_

_After a moment of contemplation Harry released Liam's arms and stalked to the basement door, slamming it behind him as he went down the stairs to the bedroom. With anger still coursing through him he pushed over a table which contained photos of him and Liam on their one year anniversary both of them sporting dopey smiles and damp clothing._

_Once he had calmed down enough he could hear sobs coming from upstairs and it broke his heart. When the sobs quieted Harry wandered up the stairs to find Liam curled up fast asleep clutching the photo that had been knocked off the wall. With a sad sigh Harry picked up his boyfriend in his arms and carried him to their bedroom, placing him on the bed with a kiss before making his way back down to the basement._

The longer Harry stood in the room, the more suffocating the memories seemed, the more they clenched at his heart. This room held too many memories, more than he was willing to relive. The more Harry thought about that one fight the more stupid he had realized he was being, they had been dating for about a year and a half and were going through a rough patch and instead of trying to sort it out with Liam Harry had turned away from him. Half-heartedly Harry turned around and trudged up the stairs feeling as though he was being crushed with the weight of those bitter memories. Turning off the lights Harry closed the door, never wanting to go down those stairs again. 

Slowly Harry made his way to the front of the house again stopping in the living room which was as cold and dark as when he had left it. Harry looked out the large window that faced the small front lawn and the road, all which were covered in snow and ice. Once there had been curtains hanging on those windows, the whole room had been warmly lit and had given off a warm feeling. Harry closed his eyes and he could picture exactly how everything had once looked. A large carpet had covered the wooden floors, covering an ugly scratch in the wood that had come from dropping a rake. As Harry relived that memory he couldn't remember why the rake had ever been inside the house but pushed the thought out of his mind. Smiling slightly Harry sat in the centre of the room and closed his eyes, ignoring the cold wood against his jeans. 

_A Christmas tree stood in the window, decorations hanging from every branch, its glowing lights the only source of light in the house. Liam and Harry were cuddled up on a sofa, Harry lying on top of Liam, head nestling in the crook of Liam's neck. It was their fourth Christmas together._

_"Do you think I can open a present now Liam?" Harry whispered against his skin._

_Liam shrugged. "I mean if you want to."_

_With that Harry was jumping off Liam's chest and running towards the Christmas tree before he tripped on his legs and fell to the ground._

_"Oww." Harry whined as he spit out pieces of carpet that managed to make their way into his mouth._

_Liam was howling on the sofa clutching his stomach causing Harry to frown as he sat up._

_"Does my pain bring you pleasure Liam?" Harry asked very seriously but it only caused Liam to laugh harder. Huffing Harry crawled the rest of the way to the tree since his feet and legs had betrayed him. As he reached for a present underneath the tree Harry felt Liam press up against him and pull him into a hug, his back resting against Liam's chest._

_"I'm sorry babe, you're just adorable." Liam pulled Harry into his lap as Harry clutched a present to his chest. Gently Liam placed a kiss on Harry's head and ran his fingers through his hair causing Harry to moan slightly. He had always loved it when people played with his hair._

_"Do you think we'll do this with are children one day? Like open a present on Christmas Eve? I mean it's kind of become a tradition for us hasn't it Li?" With his back still pressed to Liam's chest Harry began to run his fingers along the seam of the gift, itching to rip it open._

_Liam was silent for a moment and Harry was beginning to panic, they had never talked about having children together and had only briefly talked about marriage so Harry was beginning to worry that maybe he had overstepped his boundaries until Liam spoke, "Who knows, maybe, but you'd probably let them open all of them knowing you." Gently Liam poked Harry in the stomach. "But for now open your present, this one is from me."_

_Harry smiled at the small box that he held in his hands before he ripped off the beautiful bow and paper and was left with a small velvet box in his hands. Now Harry wasn't stupid, he had seen movies before and he knew what little velvet boxes normally held. Either a ring would be inside and he would begin to cry, or there would be a necklace inside and he would have to figure out a way to make it sounds as though the necklace was everything he had ever wanted. Harry's heart rate started to pick up as he slowly opened the box when it was fully opened he saw that there was nothing in it. Confused Harry tilted his head to the side slightly before he felt Liam pushing him off of his chest. Harry turned so that he was facing Liam. When he looked at Liam he saw that he was holding a silver band in his hand._

_"I know it's cliché to do this on Christmas, but I know how much you love this holiday." Liam smiled and Harry's mouth widened slightly._

_"Harry I love everything about you, from your adorable dimples to your annoying need to get a tattoo every other week." Blushing Harry chuckled and bowed his head until he felt Liam's fingertips tilting his head back up to look him in the eyes._

_"I love your stupidly long legs and your clumsiness and I want to have those in my life forever, well not just your legs, I mean you, all of you. So Harry I was wondering, will you marry me?"_

_Harry couldn't help but burst into tears as he lunged forward and tackled Liam to the floor, planting kisses all over his face while chanting 'yes, yes, yes!’. Liam smiled widely as he pushed Harry off of him so that he was sitting again. Gently he took Harry's hand and slid the ring onto his finger as Harry tried to place more kisses onto Liam._

_"It's perfect." Harry whispered as he pulled away from Liam to look at the ring on his finger._

_"I tried to get one that would go well with the other ones you have. I was worried you wouldn't like it." Liam admitted._

_Gasping dramatically Harry clutched his hand to his chest. "Liam James Payne, why would you ever think that I wouldn't like anything that you would give me!"_

_Liam rolled his eyes, god he loved this boy. "Because remember when I bought you those sho-"_

_He was cut off with a massive hand being placed over his mouth. "Shush, let's not re-live that moment; it was very traumatic for both of us._

_Liam smiled and pulled Harry's hand off of his mouth before pulling him into a hug. "I love you so much." Again he ran his fingers through Harry's hair and ran his lips along Harry's jaw, his stubble scratching Harry's skin slightly causing Harry to moan. Lips ran over his cheek and Liam gently pressed a kiss to the side of his mouth, then the other before placing a kiss on Harry's lips._

_"I love you too." Harry whispered against Liam's lips, wrapping his legs around Liam's torso to close the distance between them so that his chest was flush to Liam's. "Now take me upstairs and show me just how much you love me."_

Opening his eyes slowly, Harry noticed how damp his cheeks were, and how watery his vision was. The coldness from the house and the wood had seeped into Harry's bones and he was shivering as he sat in the middle of the bare room. The tightness in his throat was making it hard to breathe. Rubbing his hands over his face, Harry stood and looked around the room. So much had changed since then, now there was no longer a ring on his finger. Once again Harry stood in the centre of the room before he made his way up the carpeted steps. He couldn't help but think about all the times Liam had scolded him for walking up the stairs with his boots on, claiming that they ruined the carpet, Harry had argued that the carpet was already ruined so him wearing his shoes would do little to damage them. Now however, Liam wasn't there to scold him. Silently Harry walked up the stairs, the only sound in the house coming from the squeaking of the odd stair which caused Harry to smile to himself. The house had been old when they bought it, but it was all they could afford and they made it work. It was tiny but Harry claimed that it had so much character so that size didn't matter. 

At the top of the stairs were three small rooms, one which had been Liam and Harry's bedroom, a bathroom, and another small room with a sofa and TV and miscellaneous other objects that had no other place to call a home. Harry walked into the one room which had once held a sofa and Harry's guitar. This room, much like the guest bedroom, was the place where Liam would sleep when Harry would refuse to let him into the master bedroom. And just like the guest room downstairs this room held too many memories that Harry was trying to block out of his mind. 

_"Harry I promise I didn't kiss her!" Liam tried to reason as he followed Harry up the stairs._

_They had been at Louis's party and had just moved into their house so Louis decided to throw a party at his own house, reasoning that it was a party to celebrate Liam and Harry finally moving in together. And it was one hell of a celebration before Harry saw a girl who looked a lot like Liam's ex-girlfriend crowd Liam into a corner. Not wanting to start something Harry tried to ignore them while he went to talk with Niall in hopes of distracting himself. However as he talked with Niall he couldn't help but look out of the corner of his eye to spy on his boyfriend and the woman he was with. When he saw the woman lean in to what looked extremely a lot like a kiss he excused himself from Niall and went over to them. As he neared them he was able to make out that it was Liam's recent ex-girlfriend and when he saw Liam's hand resting on her waist Harry broke down and ran out of Louis's flat. Liam, who had seen Harry near him and Sophia and then turn and run away, pushed her aside to run after Harry._

_Harry was just starting the car when Liam opened the door and sat in the passenger seat._

_"What the hell do you want?" Harry spat as he put the car into drive._

_"I know it looks ba-"_

_"Looks bad?" Harry said cutting Liam off. "It can't 'look bad' when what I saw was what truly happened!"_

_Harry clenched the steering-wheel as he drove the short drive home, hoping to get as far away from Liam as he could._

_"Nothing happened Harry, honestly."_

_Harry snorted. "Oh I'm sure! I know you still like her; you always light up when someone mentions her name! But it's okay, I get it, I mean she broke up with you and I'm just the rebound, it’s okay. It's not like I was really into you or anything, and you clearly still have feelings for her, and so does she so who am I to stand in the way of that."_

_"You always do this Harry." Liam sighed as he looked out the window._

_"Do what; get upset when I see my boyfriend cheating on me? Well I'm sorry that I have a heart Liam."_

_"That's not what I meant Harry!" Liam yelled. "You always look for ways to start fights with me!"_

_"You know what; I don't need to listen to you." Harry said as he pulled up in front of their house._

_Getting out, Harry stalked towards the front door, keys in hand when Liam grabbed his arm. "Harry listen to me, nothing happened between the two of us. She doesn't mean anything to me anymore, not when I have you."_

_"Why don't you go tell that to someone who will listen." Harry snapped as he ripped his arm from Liam's grasp, unlocked the door before storming upstairs._

_Once Liam had made it upstairs he found that the bedroom door was locked and closed, and no matter how much he begged and pleaded with Harry, it wasn't going to come unlocked that night. Sighing Liam opened the closet door in the hallway and pulled out a thin blanket and pillow and made his way to the TV room. As he lay on the sofa he could hear Harry's sobs as he called who Liam assumed was Louis, he always called Louis when he was upset with Liam. From the room Liam could hear what Harry was saying to Louis through his tears._

_"He kissed her Lou, I saw it." Harry wiped his face as he spoke with Louis but the tears kept streaming down his cheeks._

_"Harry are you positive?" Louis asked, trying to create some peace between him and Liam._

_"Yes! I should've known that he still liked her; I mean he was straight when I met him! I'm such an idiot." Harry hung his head in defeat as the tears continued._

_There was a sigh from the other end of the phone. "Harry I don't know if this relationship is healthy, for either of you, I mean you and him are always fighting, is he really worth all the fighting? You're like day and night, both of you are complete opposites, maybe in this case opposites don't attract."_

_"I'm not going to leave him." Harry sobbed, his face scrunching up._

_"But Harry listen to me, he knows you're insecure when it comes to his girlfriend, it's not fair to you if he keeps going to her." Louis tried to reason._

_"No, I'm staying with him."_

_"Fine, be stubborn about this, but don't come crying to me when this whole thing comes crashing down." With that Louis hung up and Harry cried himself to sleep._

_The next morning when Harry wandered out of the bedroom, face swollen from crying, he immediately made his way to Liam to apologize. Liam who had been curled up on the small sofa smiled slightly when he saw Harry stumble into the room and opened his arms for Harry. A tear slipped out of Harry's eyes as he walked over to Liam and collapsed on his chest._

_"I'm sorry Liam. I was being dramatic and stupid."_

_"No, I should've realized how insecure you were. I'm sorry babe. But I'm willing to make things work if you are."_

_Harry nodded and curled further into Liam even though there was barely enough room on the sofa for one person they made it work. And they would try to make things work between the two of them._

The funny thing was that when their whole relationship came crashing down Harry turned to Louis, and Louis comforted him. As Harry walked out of the room he wondered why he was doing this to himself, he didn't need to be putting himself through all this pain yet he couldn't seem to leave until he had gone through each room in the house for one last time. Looking at things now Harry understood why his friends had always warned him about his relationship with Liam. They always were so toxic when they were together. But they weren't able to make things work, and this house was just a reminder of their failure. 

Walking out of the room Harry had to steady himself on a wall so he didn't collapse on himself. His emotions were getting the best of him, and with only one more room left to go through Harry wasn't sure if he really wanted to go into that room. Determined, Harry walked into the room that held the most memories. 

The room looked basically the same; there had never been much in their bedroom as they seemed to run out of decorations by the time they made their way to the master. Not that either of them cared, they were the only ones who would see the room, unless one of their mothers felt like being nosy. Harry remembered all the times they would run to their bedroom once one of their mums had said that she wanted to see the bedroom, each time they would check to see if any condoms were laying on the floor or wherever and tried to make the room presentable as each of them laughed, rushing to clean up their messiness. 

Harry walked to where the bed had once been placed and laid down on the floor, looked up at the ceiling like he had done so many times before. He could practically see Liam painting the walls the brown that they were today, see Liam coming out of the closet asking if what he was wearing looked okay, could practically see and feel Liam hovering over him, and it hurt. 

_After Liam had given Harry the ring for Christmas he had carried Harry up the stairs to their bedroom. Liam struggled as he walked up the stairs because Harry kept pulling at his jumper, trying to get it over his head and kiss him at the same time. Finally they made it to the top of the stairs and Liam pushed Harry up against the wall, connecting their lips. Harry moaned as Liam ran his tongue along his lips, giving Liam access to the inside of his mouth. Locking their lips together, Harry tangled his fingers through Liam's hair while he ground his hips against Liam's getting a groan out of Liam as he pushed Harry further against the wall. Holding him tightly, Liam moved his hands down to grip the underside of Harry's thighs. For the second time that night Liam nosed along Harry's jaw, breathing him in deeply._

_"I love you Liam, I love you." Harry whispered against Liam's skin, tilting his head to give Liam access to his neck._

_His lips latched onto the skin on Harry's neck, sucking gently and pulling the skin in between his teeth, leaving a bright red mark when he pulled away. "I love you too Harry." Liam had never meant those words more than he had at that moment, Harry was his everything._

_Connecting their lips together again Harry ran his fingers along the hem of Liam's jumper, slithering them underneath to touch the warm skin. He dragged his hands up Liam's body, Liam's shirt lifting as he did so. Liam pushed Harry against the wall for more support as he lifted his arms allowing the fabric to be pulled off of him and discarded who knows where, not that he could be bothered to care about that at this moment._

_When Harry began to work on getting Liam's belt off Liam decided to carry them to the bedroom, it was taking far too long to get undressed in the hallway. As Lim moved off the wall Harry gripped his naked back so that he wouldn't fall backwards and moaned slightly when Liam placed his hands on his ass, squeezing it gently._

_"You've got such a cute ass Harry." Liam whispered against his skin causing Harry to giggle._

_Walking into their bedroom Liam placed Harry in the middle of the bed, crawling over him to place a kiss on his soft lip. Slowly he trailed his fingers down Harry's torso, leaving a burning touch that caused Harry to shiver. A devilish smirk grew on Liam's face as his fingers danced along the waistband of Harry's jeans, teasing the younger boy before he moved his fingers to undo the button and zipper. Agonizingly slow, Liam pulled down the fabric, a gasp leaving Harry's mouth as Liam's fingers brushed against his crotch. Harry lifted up his hips to help Liam slide them down all the way before Liam threw them behind his back, ignoring the crash that followed. Liam's finger tips teasingly traced across Harry's clothed erection before Harry pulled his hands away and leaned in to kiss him again. Slowly Harry wiggled out of his shirt before he started undoing Liam's belt again and proceed to take off his trousers._

_With both of them shirtless Harry rolled them over so that he was on top of Liam and made quick work of ridding Liam from his boxers, his cock slapping up onto his abs. Harry leaned down and took Liam's cock in his hands before pressing kisses along the side of it, getting a hiss out of Liam. Wanting to hear that sound again Harry slowly flicked out his tongue each time he kissed Liam's erection._

_"Harry, don't tease." Liam begged as he bucked his hips up, wanting more friction._

_Grinning Harry opened his mouth around Liam's length, hollowing out his cheeks as he took Liam further into his mouth. Holding the base, Harry bobbed up and down Liam's length before he relaxed his mouth more allowing Liam in further so that his nose pressed into Liam's pelvis.  He moved his hand to Liam's balls, pressing against them ever so slightly before his hands traveled down and circled his hole carefully. As he did so Liam's hand immediately fly to his hair, gripping it tightly as he tried so hard not to thrust into Harry's mouth but when Harry looked up at him, cock in his mouth and eyes as dark as night Liam couldn't help it, his cock hitting the back of Harry's throat. A small moan erupted from Harry, vibrations causing Liam to moan more than he already was and thrust into Harry's mouth more. Liam could tell he was close and when Harry's tongue swiped across his slit Liam had to push Harry away._

_"Stop, stop, it's too much."_

_Harry pulled away, a small string of spit trailing from his mouth before he wiped it with the back of his hand and moved up to press a kiss to Liam's chest. Straddling his waist Harry slowly ground his ass against Liam's crock, moaning lowly as he did so._

_"You're wearing far too much clothing Harry." Liam whispered as he rolled them over again and began to pull down Harry's boxers. Boxers finally off, Liam started gently kissing up Harry's thigh before he came to the round fleshy part of Harry's ass. Liam's hands snaked underneath Harry and gripped his arse, kneading it in his hands as Harry hooked one of his legs around Liam's shoulder. Liam lowered his head as he spread apart Harry's cheeks and without warning plunged his tongue into the tightness of Harry’s hole. A cry left Harry's lips and he thrust back, trying to get more of Liam into him. Leisurely Liam licked into as though he wasn’t making Harry fall apart at the grace of his tongue before he wrapped his lips around Harry's hole and sucked the puffy skin as hard as he could. Curses left Harry's mouth as he threaded his fingers through Liam's hair, scratching his blunt nails against his scalp as Liam licked into him, his beard rubbing Harry raw. Harry’s back arched when he felt Liam circle a finger around his rim before it pushed in, Liam's rough finger prodding inside of him. Liam suddenly pulled his finger out of him, causing Harry to hiss at the loss, only to watch him lean over and pull a bottle of lube out of the nightstand. When Harry felt a cold, wet finger enter him he moan and rocked back against it._

_"More Liam." Harry pleaded as Liam began to ram his finger in and out of Harry._

_Obliging Liam added a second wet finger and started to scissor his fingers and stretch Harry out. He continued to stretch Harry when he pushed his fingers deep inside of the boy and pressed them against the bundle of nerves that he found instantly. Harry let out a filthy groan at the sensation and moaned out Liam's name breathlessly._

_"Liam please."_

_"Please what Harry?" Liam teased as he began to take his fingers out of him._

_"Please make love to me." Harry whispered, looking deeply into Liam's eyes as he spoke._

_Liam quickly lubed up his length and pressed it against Harry's hole. Intertwining his fingers with Harry's, Liam pushed in all the way until he was flush against Harry's arse. He waited a moment to let the boy adjust before he pulled out almost all the way only to slam back into him. As he did so Harry's legs fell open around Liam's waist allowing him in even deeper. While he thrust into Harry, Liam latched his lips onto his neck and started sucking gently on his skin forming a bruise within seconds. Liam thrust into Harry deeply, searching for that place that he had found so easily with his fingers moments before and a moan left Liam's lips. When his cock brushed against Harry's prostate Harry dug his nails into Liam's back, leaving scratch marks that would be on his back for the days to come. Harry slowly began to feel that familiar tingling in his stomach when he moved his hand down to his own dick only to have it knocked out of the way by Liam's hand. Harry was about to protest before he felt Liam's hand wrap around his cock and jerk him off in time with his thrusts. Breathing heavily, Harry connected his lips with Liam's as he came across his stomach with a shout of Liam's name. Feeling Harry clench around him, Liam thrust into him harder and deeper before he came deep inside of Harry._

_As both of them tried to regain their breath Liam pulled out of Harry causing him to whine slightly. Liam rolled off of Harry and let go of Harry's hand only to run a finger over Harry's puffy hole to push the come back inside of him that had dripped out. Harry swatted Liam's hand away and whined slightly at the oversensitivity before he tried to roll over onto Liam's chest only to be brushed off. Harry frowned slightly only to smirk he watched Liam's arse as Liam got off of the bed and walked to the bathroom to get a towel._

_When Liam came back into the bedroom his smiled to himself as he saw Harry's naked frame curl in on himself, he couldn't believe he was lucky enough to be engaged to this boy. Liam sat down on the bed, wiping the come off of Harry's stomach before he moved the towel to his hole, much to Harry's annoyance._

_"You'll thank me later." Liam said as he threw the towel onto the floor and snuggled up against Harry, spooning his larger frame._

_The room was silent for a couple of minutes; Liam was kissing along Harry's shoulder when Harry spoke up._

_"What will our last names be?" Harry turned his head to look at Liam over his shoulder. He looked so happy and relaxed that Liam couldn't help but smile widely._

_"Well..." Harry shifted in Liam's arms so that he was facing him now. "We could like smoosh our last names together like, Stayne. Or...Pyles...?"_

_Harry burst out laughing at the last name as he rested his head on Liam's sweaty chest. "I hate the last one; it sounds like a disease of something awful. But you know I was thinking about this and I don't like how Harry Payne sounds; I think Liam Styles sounds much better."_

_Liam rolled his eyes fondly. "Whatever makes you happy Haz."_

_"Well then, it's settled, Styles it is." Harry giggled and pulled the covers around them, snuggling into the warmth of Liam_

It hurt too much to think about what could have been, what could have happened if they had both been more patient, had tried to understand each other more, tried to compromise. It could have been so easy to fix if they had tried harder, maybe it would've been helpful to go to a therapist, talk about what was going on, maybe they should have listened to their friends more. But it was too late now. 

His body had begun to stiffen from lying on the hard floor for so long. As Harry struggled to get off of the ground he wondered why he was putting himself through this, he didn't need to go through the house one more time; he knew full well that everything was in perfect condition. It would have been so much easier to simply get the relator to look through the house, look for any blemishes or whatnot, it's not like Harry was really looking for those anyways. 

With a groan Harry stood to his feet, looking out the window he had looked out many times before and walked towards the small balcony that held the only piece of furniture that had been left in this bloody house. A small, plastic chaise lounge chair stood on the balcony, covered in snow. Liam had always found it pointless to have a lounge chair out on the balcony when it was never sunny in England let alone warm, but Harry had insisted on it. However when he had moved out Harry didn't have the heart to take the chair with him, hoping that someone else would have better use of it than he ever had. Although, he had used it at least twice, once being when he decided to be optimistic and go outside and read a book while the sun was shining through the overbearing clouds for once. Sadly he only managed to stay outside for ten minutes before the sky opened up and soaked him and his book that he never had the chance to read, so instead he was forced to go back inside to see Liam who had a face which read I told you so and a ruined book. The second time Harry had gotten any use out of the chair so had Liam. 

_Harry looked out the window at night to see that for the first time in a long time the sky was clear and a few stars were shining brightly in the black inked sky. Frantically Harry ran through the house searching for Liam, afraid that the usual clouds would cover up the clear sky before Liam had the chance to see it._

_Harry had found Liam in the kitchen sitting at the table eating a sandwich which Harry found odd as it was the middle of the night. Choosing not to question it Harry ran into the kitchen and placed his hand on Liam's._

_"Liam you have to come upstairs, the stars are out!" Harry exclaimed._

_Shaking his head, Liam only chuckled. "Babe I have seen stars before."_

_"I know but they're different tonight! It's, it's like they're brighter or something, waiting just for you to come out so they can shine for you."_

_The words sounded oddly familiar coming out of his mouth but Harry simply ignored it and began pleading with Liam. "I promise that your sandwich will still be here when you get back. Please Liam; please come look at the stars with me?" When Harry pulled out his pout Liam couldn't help but say yes and take Harry by the hand as he walked him up the stairs._

_"I promise you won't regret it Liam, they're just so pretty tonight!" Harry said as they entered the bedroom and pulled him out to the balcony._

_Liam shivered as the cold night air hit his skin and Harry was quickly making his way back inside so that he could grab the duvet off of their bed and wrap it around the two of them._

_"Come on Liam, sit down with me, it's not like the chair is going to bite you." He said, coming back out onto the balcony._

_Obeying Liam sat down on the stupid lounge chair that had been a waste of twenty pounds and opened his arms for Harry to snuggle up in. Harry lay down in between Liam's legs, his feet hanging off the edge of the chair as his back pressed into Liam's chest, and wrapped the blanket around both of them. A content sigh left his lips as he snuggled into Liam and looked up at the stars, it wasn't anything special but if Harry was happy than Liam was also happy._

_They sat in silence and Liam was beginning to fall asleep when Harry began nudging him._

_"Look! It's a shooting star!"_

_His eyes flew open and at the very last second Liam saw the flash across the hemisphere and smiled._

_"Did you see it?" Harry asked, hoping that Liam and he could share this moment together; it wasn't often that they saw shooting stars._

_"I did, I don't think I've ever seen one before, well maybe when I was little but, wow, I forgot how bright they were." Liam said in awe as he looked up at the night sky._

_"Well, aren't you glad that you listened to old wise Harry and came outside? I bet if you had stayed inside and eaten your little sandwich you never would have seen this. Guess you should listen to me more often." Harry giggled and Liam pinched his side slightly._

_"Oh yes almighty Harry." Liam wrapped his arms around Harry's waist, holding him close._

_"Hmm, I like that; maybe you should call me that more often." Harry joked._

_"Oh shut up, or else I'll take this chair back."_

_"Liam, let’s be serious, no one would want to take it back." Harry said, turning his head so that he was looking at Liam._

_Liam kissed his forehead gently before replying. "I can't help but feel that you're very right about that."_

_The two of them were planning on spending the rest of the night out there until Harry eventually fell asleep and his snores brought Liam back to reality, snapping him back to earth momentarily. It had begun to get very cold outside, and Harry was deadweight on top of him and Liam, being the caring boyfriend that he was, didn't want Harry to catch a cold, even though he was adorable and needy when he was sick. And Liam would be lying if he said that it was very comfortable on the plastic chair, so he gently picked up Harry, legs hanging over his arms and carried him back into the house. As he placed Harry on the bed and pulled the cold duvet over him Harry's eyes fluttered open._

_"Look at the stars, look how they shine for you." A dopey smile spread across his face as he sung the lyrics half asleep._

_"Yeah, yeah Mr. Coldplay, now close your eyes, I'm sure the stars will still shine for you when you're asleep." He placed a kiss on Harry's cheek and smiled to himself as Harry's eyes slipped shut and sleep overcame him._

Harry brushed off the snow as he sat down on the lounge chair; it was a lot colder tonight than it had been when he and Liam had sat out here all those months ago. Harry sat out on the balcony, listening to the faint sounds of cars driving down streets, doors opening and closing for the night, car engines shutting off. It was a shame that they hadn't used the balcony more than twice, of course there was the odd time he would venture out to get a breath of fresh air, and of course they would open the door to let the room air out when it smelt too much like sex for either of their liking. But there was something calming about the balcony that Harry hadn't discovered until now, and just like everything else in his life, it had been discovered too late. 

When the cold air begun to seep into his bones Harry went back inside trying to block the memories that threatened to flood back into his mind as he walked through the bedroom. The entire house held too many memories. Slowly Harry left the bedroom, in it leaving behind all the times, all the laughter, the sex, the love that he had ever shared with Liam. Harry passed by the bathroom, where they had spent so much time together. They had only had one sink which made things interesting when they were trying to get ready for work in the morning. More often than not one of them would end up falling into the toilet. After years they managed to make the small cramped room work for both of them, but the process had taken much practice. Other memories were shared in the shower where Harry would usually end up joining Liam and they would end up getting dirtier rather than cleaner. All the shared memories seemed so alive yet so dead. 

Harry ventured down the narrow hallway running his fingers along the walls like he had done so many times in the past. Harry walked down the stairs and even they held a damn memory which Harry couldn't help but let flood through him one last time. It was a bitter sweet memory one that only he and Liam shared and knew about. 

_Harry came home from working at the bakery, a part time job until he found something better. As he entered the house he could see that all the lights had been shut off. Darkness was never a good thing. The house was silent except for the occasional sniffle that came from upstairs. If Harry strained his ears he could tell that they were coming from Liam._

_Panic suddenly coursed through his body. Racking through his brain Harry tried to think of everything that he had done in the morning and throughout the day that could've caused Liam to be upset. He couldn't think of anything so decided that it would be best if he went to Liam. Excepting to find Liam curled up in the middle of their bed Harry was shocked when he found Liam curled up on a thin step in the middle of the stair case. The panic was replaced by heart ache as Harry rushed over to Liam who was beginning to sob loudly._

_"Liam, baby, what's wrong, what happened?" Sitting on a step below Liam, Harry tried to wrap his arms around Liam's body but Liam's position on the stairs made it almost impossible._

_Liam said nothing and only moved to curl up in Harry's lap as the tears proceeded to fall down his face. His eyes were puffy and his breathing kept racking through him the longer that he clung to Harry's warm body._

_"Liam, please, have I done something to upset you?" Harry asked feeling the panic begin to bubble up in him again._

_"No." Liam's voice was barely above a whisper._

_"Then what's got you so upset?" Harry ran his large hands over Liam's arms, tugging him closer to his body._

_Liam shook his head and clung to Harry's shirt, staining it with his tears. "My sister."_

_"What, which sister, what happened?"_

_Harry's words seemed to send Liam into another fit of tears and it took a couple more minutes of Harry simply holding Liam's body which seemed so small at the moment before Liam finally spoke up again. "Nicola, she's, she's dead."_

_Harry's mouth fell open and he suddenly wished that Liam's tears had been because Harry did something stupid and not because his sister had passed away. And although Harry had only met Nicola a handful of times and knew very little about her Harry couldn't stop the tears that flowed down his face. He loved Liam, and seeing Liam in pain hurt him more that it should have._

_"How?" Harry asked after what felt like an hour of silent tears coursing down both of their faces._

_"I-I don't know, all my mom said was that the doctors assumed that it was some medical condition that she didn't know about. Harry, please tell me this isn't real, tell me that I'm asleep. I just saw her two days ago, she was so alive. She can't be dead Harry, tell me this is a sick joke, pinch me, anything, she can't be dead!" Liam broke down into violent tears, struggling to breathe as his heart felt like it was being compressed in his chest. "This can't be true, tell me it's not true!"_

_All Harry could do was hold him and tell him that everything would be okay as the tears streamed down his face. The thing was that Harry didn't know if everything would be okay, nothing ever felt the same or okay after a loved one passed away. After hours of rocking Liam in his arms on the stairs, Liam had cried himself out of tears and fallen asleep from exhaustion. Harry felt numb as he carried Liam upstairs; it felt as though everything was frozen, that he was dead to the world. Liam felt heavier in his arms than he normally did and Harry felt the weight that Liam was carrying on his shoulders and on his heart pass to him. Carefully Harry placed Liam on their bed and curled his body around Liam's smaller one. He made a mental note to call in work, let them know that he wouldn't be coming in for the next couple of days, he knew that Liam shouldn't be alone as the pain would only grow in the following days._

_The day of the funeral was suffocating. Everything felt too dark, the black clothing was too much, the sad music was too much. It seemed unfair that considering that Nicola was such a bright person, that her funeral held none of the light that she had held throughout her life. It didn't feel like she was gone, no one could believe it, and no one wanted to, the only thing that kept reminding them that she was gone was the dull pain in their hearts that would fade and grow. After everyone had said what they loved and would miss about her both Liam and Harry felt drained, they had cried all the tears that they could. That night as Harry curled up around Liam's smaller body, holding him tighter than he ever had before._

It still felt weird to think that Nicola was no longer alive, it almost didn't seem possible. As Harry walked down the stairs he stopped on the step that he had found Liam curled up on all those months ago. He could still hear Liam's sobs as he sat down on the step. Not only had Harry lost Liam, but he had also lost his family, lost all those friends that he had met because of Liam. 

Feeling numb once again, Harry walked down the stairs, reliving every memory that they held, from the kisses to the tears. A chuckle escaped his lips as he thought about the time where he was running late for a shopping trip with Nick and ended up falling down the stairs, he ended up with a broken arm and a lot of scolding from Liam. 

He stepped off the carpeted steps onto the hardwood flooring being careful not to slip. One last time Harry walked into the kitchen, checking to see that all the drawers and cupboards were closed. He knew they were but he just needed to take a final walkthrough the house that he had spent four years living in, the house he had expected to spend more years in. With sad eyes Harry left the kitchen and walked back into the front room, the room Liam had proposed to him in. So much had changed since the proposal. 

Harry closed his eyes and he could still picture himself calling his friends telling them the news, the tears that streamed down his face when he called his mother and told her their plans, they had been happy tears. But the longer he closed his eyes the more he remembered the tears that weren't caused by joy. The tears that had been caused from so many insecurities, so many pointless fights, fights that could have been avoided if they had only stopped yelling and listened to one another. 

Harry walked to the small entrance where he had place the mug and a small box of things he had found in various doors. As he reached down to pick up the cardboard box Harry couldn't help but notice the small chip in the paint that had been caused by him three weeks ago. 

_They both stormed into the house, both equally upset with the other. Harry had followed Liam upstairs, yelling various curses at him, trying to get his attention. No matter what he said Liam seemed to block it out, as though he was completely finished with Harry, done. Neither of them knew what they were fighting about any more but the words kept spilling out of their mouths. Harry's words seemed to be egging Liam on, giving him a reason to grab the small suitcase that was stashed in the closet and proceed to throw various items into it._

_Harry watched as Liam piled clothing into the suitcase and the words stopped flowing out of his mouth. He paused, trying to remember what he was so angry about, remembering him and Liam bickering in the car about something to do with the wedding. The time before the wedding was meant to be a celebration, instead it seemed like Harry and Liam were constantly at each other’s throats. Harry thought they were both just stressed, but it seemed as though it had been the final straw for Liam._

_"What are you doing?" Harry asked, his voice sounding much smaller than he had meant for it too._

_The silence was deafening and Harry started to panic. "Liam, what are y-"_

_"What does it look like I'm doing Harry?" Liam yelled, his voice causing Harry to flinch._

_"I-I don't know!" Harry replied sounding frantic as he watched from the doorway as Liam continued to fill his suitcase._

_With a loud sound Liam shut the suitcase causing Harry to jump at the sound before Liam stalked towards him. When Harry didn't move to the side Liam tried to push him but Harry only refused to move._

_"Get the fuck out of my way Harry! I'm done with you and all your never ending shit!"_

_"My never ending shit? Are you serious Liam?" Harry shouted back at him, not moving from his position in the doorway._

_Anger bubbled up in both men and with a harsh shove Liam was pushing Harry out of his way, the suitcase trailing behind him. Liam got about halfway down the hallway before Harry was grabbing his arm, suddenly everything felt all too familiar. Using his strength Harry tried to pull Liam back towards him but Liam was resisting him, using his strength to fight Harry off._

_"Harry stop being so childish!" Liam spat in his face, twisting his arm so that Harry had no choice but to let go._

_Finally free from Harry's vice grip Liam proceeded down the stairs again with Harry following him closely behind._

_"Will you stop acting so childish Liam and actually talk to me? I can't fix anything if you don't talk to me!" Harry seethed following Liam as he walked through the living room and towards the front door. "You're not leaving me."_

_A bitter laugh passed through Liam's lips. "Since when did you decide what I can and cannot do Harry? You don't own me, and frankly I'm fed up with you, this is too much, one moment you're too clingy the next you're shouting at me, begging me to fight with you. Is that what you want Harry? Do you like getting into fights with me? Because you seem to do it a hell of a lot and you know what, I'm sick of it, sick of you!" Liam's words cut through Harry's heart deeply._

_Liam placed the suitcase at the front door before he walked into the kitchen, Harry following him behind closely. Liam searched through cupboards, slamming them shut when he didn't find what he wanted. Harry had no idea what he was looking for but he walked over to the countertop where a plate was sitting._

_"You just think you can control everyone and everything around you, don't you? Well I'm sorry but I didn't realize I was stepping onto Planet Harry when I first started dating you!"_

_"You're full of shit Liam!" Without thinking Harry grabbed the plate and threw it at Liam's head, it barely missed Liam's head but luckily Liam ducked in time._

_The porcelain shattered into millions of pieces. Liam turned to look at Harry, all the colour in his eyes gone. At first Harry didn't realize what the matter was until he realized that he had thrown a plate that Nicola had given to Liam only a few days before she passed away._

_"Shit, Liam I'm sorry I didn-"_

_"No! I've had it with you Harry. Why don't you go find someone else's life to ruin? Please just spare me."_

_Liam turned and stormed out of the kitchen, Harry again following him to the front of the house. This time it hit him what was happening and he tried to do anything to get Liam to stay._

_"Liam please, I'm sorry, look we can go to a councillor or something, get this all sorted out. Just please don't leave me!"_

_His whole world and life revolved around Liam, without Liam in it Harry wasn't sure if he would be able to go on. At least he didn't want to, not without Liam in his life._

_"Save it for someone who cares." Liam said dangerously as he pulled on his shoes._

_"You can't just propose to me, tell me you love me and then leave me Liam!" Harry tried to reason, he didn't want to let Liam go, couldn't let him slip through his fingers._

_Opening the door Liam replied. "Watch me."_

_"Fuck you Liam!" With that Harry pulled off the ring that had been on his fingers for months and threw it at Liam's face. It missed and instead hit the wall before it rolled under the closet. "Why don't you just take the fucking ring with you? Fuck you! You're a liar Liam! You promised me that you would never leave me!"_

_Without a response Liam walked out the door, leaving Harry behind him as he got into his car, never looking back as he did so. Harry watched him get into the car and watched as he drove off, tears beginning to well up in his eyes. He closed the door and slid down onto the floor, allowing the sobs to overcome him and rack through his body. It was over, Liam had left him, after so many years Harry had managed to chase him off for good. He knew that there wasn't going to be a makeup this time, the look on Liam's face had determined that. Tears poured down his face as he collapsed onto the floor, never wanting to get back up. Four years of his life, wasted._

Harry couldn't stop the tears that ran down his cheeks, it still hurt too much. He hadn't seen or spoken to Liam since that day, three weeks without Liam, it was the longest he had ever been apart from Liam in four years. Now it would be an eternity without him. As the tears poured down Harry's face he didn't bother wiping them away. Before he left the house for one final time, Harry opened the closet door and picked up the ring that he had thrown at Liam, he couldn't leave it behind, couldn't bring himself to do it. 

One last time Harry looked back into the house, feeling more tears fill into his eyes. When he felt like he was about to break down he opened the front door and walked out into the cold night air. Wiping his eyes he closed the door behind him and locked it for one final time. Hiccupping Harry made his way down the icy walkway, trying to ignore the For Sale sign as he made his way to his car. He slipped slightly and landed on his knees, ripping his jeans and for a moment he contemplated not getting up ever again, letting the cold air suck the life out of him. He knew he was being irrational but it was tempting. Getting up, Harry brushed off his jeans and opened the door to his car. 

As he sat in the confines of his car he couldn't stop the tears that came. All the memories taking their toll on Harry, and he broke down, letting all the emotion, frustration, anger, sadness flow through him. He rested his head on the steering wheel in defeat. Every moment with Liam rushed through his brain, shattering what little of his fragile heart still remained. The salty tears dripped over the swell of his lips and he swiped it away with his tongue as cries took over his body. 

Maybe all their friends had been right all along, they were polar opposites of each other, why did they ever think that they could make things work between the two of them. 

Harry didn't know how long he had been sitting in the car, letting out all of his emotions when he wiped his face and decided to man up, if Liam was able to let him go than he should be able to do the same. Nodding Harry started the car only to shut it off again. Who was he kidding, he was in love with Liam, he wouldn't get over him easily. Harry sat in the silence of his car, feeling numb when he heard a small tapping on one of his windows. Looking to the source of the sound Harry found that Liam was standing outside his car. For a moment he thought that his mind was playing tricks on him before the tapping on his window happened again. He rubbed his eyes frantically before he opened the door and got out of the car, trying to make it look like he hadn't just been bawling over the man who was now in front of him. 

"Liam?" Harry whispered, his voice breaking slightly. 

A sad smile spread across his face. "Yeah, it's me Hazza." 

Harry tried not to cry, he really did, but when he heard Liam's old pet name for him he burst into fresh tears and collapsed into Liam's arms. 

"Is it really you?" Tears poured down his face as he held onto Liam tightly, fearing that if he let him go he would disappear forever. 

"It's really me babe." Liam's voice was raw as he spoke. 

Harry shook his head, it felt like a dream. "What are you doing here?" 

"Coming back for you Harry." Liam whispered as he pulled Harry onto his feet and looked him in the eyes. 

"But you left me." Harry said, not really understanding what was happening. 

Gently he placed his hands on Harry's face and pulled Harry into him, connecting their lips again. Harry moaned slightly and wrapped his arms tighter around Liam's waist. Running his hands through Harry's curls and smiling gently Liam spoke again and it was all that Harry had been waiting to hear. "I'll always come back to you Harry." 


End file.
